Wacky Holiday Challenge - August 3rd

Today's Wacky Holidays are:

• Grab Some Nuts Day
• National Watermelon Day

______________________________________________

Blogville Public Enemy #1

Sometimes ya feel like a NUT (or twenty)!

Hummmmmm.... I may have to round up my Blogville Pawlice Force Pals to lock up da Nut Grabbers.  

Thank goodness we have Pawlice Segways so I won't have to run dem down wiff my Poor Paw.  

Speaking of my Poor Paw, here's the latest Update:  

• Mass biopsy - Melanoma but da margins are CLEAN.  Yikes butt Good news on margins.
• Stitches out.  Woohoo!  (still hopping on my poor paw occasionally)
• Chest x-ray looks good and CLEAR.  Yippy!
• Abdominal ultrasound - CLEAR!   Arrrrrrooooooo!
• Lymph node aspirated - Waiting for da results

Tomorrow's Wacky Holidays (August 4th) are:

• International Beer Day
• National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day
• U.S. Coast Guard Day 

Have Fun and get Creative!

 Wags, 

                 Ranger

Getting down to Business - Attention Blogville Police Officers

I'm out cruisin' today.

Like my ride?   It's now da Blogville Police Chief's Bat-Mobile car.

Destination:  Da Office

Mission:   Check out my new office to review my staff.

I need to name a #2 (Deputy Top Cop) and I think dat some of my officers should be promoted.     Others may want new assignments or more responsibility.

I got a list of current staff from our Police Commissioner Sarge and hope we didn't miss anyone.

My assistant, Office Manager & Head Jailer
* Hailey

DTC's ride

Deputy Top Cop
* OPEN  (gets to drive dat new Blogville Police Batcycle motorcycle)


Dispatcher
* OPEN - dis is a new position.   The Dispatcher answers 991-paws Calls and Dispatches the right officers to address the need.   They are the primary communications link to Me and all of the Officers.

Morale Officer
* OPEN - dis is another new position.  Da Officer will be responsible for keeping morale up, Police Charity events, Socials and makin' sure da we do not run out of Donuts.

Officers
* Abby the Lab
* Sully
* Augus
* Ruby

Detectives
* Zaphod, Lead Detective & Canadian Division
* Wallace, South Africa Division
* Charlie, Australian Division
* Easy, European Division

World Wide Criminal Investigator & Forensics Department
* Bertie

Bloodhound Officer
* Bentley and his assistant Pierre

Beach Patrol
* Freya Rose Blossom, England

Jr. Officers
* Riley
* Whitley
* MacDui
* Finley
* Arty
* Princess Leah
* Sophie
* Shelby
* Speedy

AND.... Special Consultant Investigators Sherlock Reilly and Dr Denny

ATTENTION - Action required

1. Please let me know (send me an email at scottierangerATgmailDOTcom) if you would like to continue to serve in our super cool POLICE Department and what position/changes/promotions you would like.
2. If you are interested in joining our Blogville Police department as a Jr. Officer, send me an email scottierangerATgmailDOTcom.   We are always lookin' for some new paws.
3. If you have police experience and are interested in joining our Blogville Police department send me an email scottierangerATgmailDOTcom.   

Thank you for your support.   I really hope dat my predecessor (Retired Chief Sidebite) approves of what I'm doing.   I wanta make him proud of me.

Wags, 

                    Chief Ranger

Pees...  I will not be addressing da Fire and Rescue Department (see Commissioner Sarge if you are looking for assistance in dat area).

I got me a Promotion

Arrrrrrrrrroooooo !!  
Perhaps you've heard, I've been promoted to Chief of Police of da Blogville Police Force.   Yep.... Police Commissioner Sarge has just promoted me.   Can you believe it?

Dis is a really BIG responsibility and I'm bowled over wiff appreciation dat Commissioner Sarge would trust me wiff da safety of Blogville.

Stay tuned as I figure out what to do next.   Today I'm just gonna enjoy da moment.

Donuts All Around!

 Wags, 

                      Chief Ranger

  

Silent Saturday - Exhausted

 Wags, 

                      Ranger, DTC

Pawlice Academy Day 5 - Field Testing

Attention Recruits. 

Are you ready for your Field Test on all da skills dat you learned dis week?

YES SIR!   We're ready.

Ok, then let's head outside and Let Da Testing Begin.   Good Luck.





Now I can't show y'all da Testing (for security reasons), but I did take a few snapshots of da recruits in action.

Here dey are:

Officer Ruby and Officer Sophie - demonstrating their weapons skills.
"We are real hotshots!"

Officer Shelby - tracking an Ant trail.
"Look at dem march".

Officer Speedy - searching out and marking evidence.
"Hummmm..... is it Easter already?"

Officer Wallace - photographing at a crime scene.
"SNAP"

Officer Freya Rose - filling out her paperwork.
"Can I do a little shredding too?"

Officer Easy and Officer Abby - interrogating a suspect.
"We may have to resort to tickling"

Officer Mickey - tracking a squirrel.
"I think he's too overweight to climb da tree."

Officer Arty - capturing a suspect.
"Can I shoot him?"

Charlie - tracking down an International criminal.
"Should I belt him wiff my down under baton?"

Officer Whitley - calling in a 10-80 “chase in progress”.
"Do you think I have a pretty voice?"

Officer Princess Leah - in pursuit of a criminal.
"Look at me fly!"

Officer Dui - destuffing a criminal stuffie.
"I got him.   Can I have a margarita now?  I'm kinda thirsty."

Officer Riley - demonstrating his superior clue diggin skills.

"Can I eat da evidence?"

Ranger:   Hummmm.... maybe I should confiscate that evidence.    Can't have the recruits on a Sugar High again.

Sidney - awaiting criminals for transport to our jail.
"I can't wait to put the siren on!" 

Officer Finley - locking up her fellow classmates.
"Who's da boss now?"

I can't wait to tell Top Cop Sidebite and Commissioner Sarge what a grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat job da recruits did!

Now head on over to Officer Top Cop Sidebite for da written exam.
Following dat we'll have da Graduation Ceremony wiff Pawlice Commissioner Sarge, followed by Officer Ruby's Donut Party.

 Wags, 

                      Ranger, DTC

Pawlice Academy Day 4 - Detective work & Most Wanted List

Welcome back to Day 4 of training.

Here's whats on the schedule for today.

• Detective Work (wiff Lead Detective Zaphod)
• Skills Drills (wiff DTC Ranger & Detective Zaphod) 
• Most Wanted list (Top Cop SideBite)

I'll be working on my Field Testing plan for the recruits.   See ya tomorrow.

Wags, 

                    Ranger DTC

Pawlice Academy Day 3 - Tracking, Paperwork and Jail House training

Welcome back to Day 3 of Pawlice recruit training.

Today we will cover:

• Tracking (wiff/Tracker Bentley & Pierre) 
• Paperwork & Activity Reports (wiff Officer Hailey,  Office manager) 
• Jail Training and Duty (wiff Lead Jailer Hailey)

Have a good class and remember dat Officer Sidebite and I will be watching.   Right now I'm taking a break for all dis training.

Des are ALL MINE !!!!!!

Wags, 

                                Officer Ranger, DTC

Pawlice Academy Day 2 - Security & Patrol skills exercises

On da schedule today, Feb 3rd is:

First up:  Officer Sully:  Security/Patrol Duties, WalkieTalkie, Take Downs, Driving.
(Read Sully's postie 1st.)

Following da lecture Officer Sully & ME will run you through some skills exercises.

Let's practice some patrolling on our Segways.  Segways are a great, fair weather, patrolling vechile and are new to da Blogville Pawlice Force.   They are fun too.

You each take turns rolling through our Segway course.  Keep your walkie-talkie on so you can hear any additional commands that Officer Sully or I may call out to you.

Abby:  Dat was Fun!

That course was way too EASY !!!!

Freya Rose:   I'm calling it in!

Freya Rose:  Breaker, Breaker.....Officer Sully, Ruby crashed her Segway.  10-4

Officer Sully:  Is she OK?  10-4

Freya Rose:   Yep... she's hickuping and laughing.  

Can I give her a ticket?   I can't wait to write my 1st ticket.  10-4

Officer Sully:  Nah.... give her a warning.   10-4

Freya Rose:  Rats.

Ruby:  Rats?   I'll get dem.   Dat's my job.   I'm on da Rodent Patrol team.

Arty:  I'm gonna win.
Finley:  I'm gonna try to stay on dis thing. 
Dis thing bucks just like a bronco.  Like my new hat?
Dui:  Heeeeee, haaaaaaa.... I'm going to have da best time ever.
I just gotta impress Princess Leah and she is standing at da end of the track.
Riley:  Look out boys..... eat my dust.

Charlie:  Crikey, these little ones are sooooooooooo.... impatient.

The recruits continued to cruise the track on dar Segways (Patrol machines).

Ranger:  What do you think?
Sully:  A lot of them did really well.   Others.... not so much.
Ranger:   I hope dey practice, practice, practice before the final exams on Friday.
Sully:   I'll work wiff dem some more.
Ranger:  Ya may need to wiffhold  donuts until dey successfully
make it through the track.
Sully:  LOL.... yep, nothing like a little donut incentive.

ATTENTION Recruits!

I've just learned dat today, is one of our recruits 3rd Gotcha Day.
Happy Gotcha Day Speedy!

Looks like y'all have something to celebrate tonight.
Now, don't stay out too late pawting with Speedy as tomorrow is another full day of training.

Now Get Out of Here!    Class Dismissed.
See y'all tomorrow.

Wags, 

                   Ranger, DTC

Pawlice Academy Day 1 - Officer Tools & Weapons

Good Afternoon Recruits.

Now it's time to learn all about some of the Tools and Weapons that you will be handling.

Let's start wiff general Officer Tools.

Your number 1 tool is your senses (eyes, ears, and nose).   They are invaluable tools of our profession.   Always stay alert and you will be a top officer.

Here are some other tools that you will be using.

Walkie-Talkie

Officer Sully will discuss usage and protocol for using this key communication tool tomorrow.   Handcuffs will also be covered in other classes.



Other Officer tools and include flashlights, batons, mace, and taser/shock collars.

Flashlight tactics - Shining a flashlight in a criminal's eyes can temporarily blind dem.   They are also used in tracking and searching for evidence and criminals.
Batons can be used to temporarily daze a criminal or to trip dem.   They are NOT used for twirling.
Mace can be use to temporarily blind a criminal, giving your time to cuff dem.   Be careful not to point da mace can at yourself or to confuse it wiff your fur spray.
Tasers/Shock Collars can be used to to spot a criminal and detain dem.   Be careful not to taser a fellow Officer.


Now it's time for Weapons handling.

Rule #1:  We use weapons Only to detain da criminals.  Criminals will be brought before Judge Frankie’s Court.

 We only use water pistols, poopie pellets, and tranquilizer darts in the Long Rifles.

Junior Officers will initially be assigned water pistols.  Most criminal do not like water and will be stopped by dem.   You can also load dem will jelly and you will find dat criminal frequently stop taste da jelly when hit.   This will give you time to cuff dem.

Full Officers will have Poopie Pellet Guns.  Da stinker da better.

Rodent Patrol Officers will also have use of Long Rifles with tranquilizers.    Right now, Office Ruby Top Cop Sidebite, Commissioner Sarge and myself are da only ones trained and allowed to use this weapon.

Now.... any questions?

Sophie:   How do I clean my water pistol?
Ranger:  You must clean your weapon daily.    Jr. Officers should use soapy water and shoot bubbles until dar weapon is totally cleaned.

Freya:  I'm a Beach Patrol Officer, can I use salt water to fill my pistol?
Ranger:  Yes, but you should still clean it daily wiff tap water so da salt doesn't clog your pistol.

Princess Leah:  Can I use pink fruit punch in my pistol?
Ranger:  Sure

Easy:   I just wanted to mention dat Full Officers should not load dar poopie pellet pistol with fresh poop.   From experience, I can tell you that it will clog da pistol.   Oh, and cleaning it will be nasty.
Charlie:  Crikey Easy.....now that would be a poopie slider.   Baaawwwaahaaaa.

Ranger:  And now..... we'll head outside to practice wiff our weapons.   All Jr Officers should pair up with a Sr. Officer and they will show you how to load, shoot, and clean your water pistols.    DUI!  Wear are you going?
Dui:  I just wanted another donut.
Ranger:  You can have more donuts AFTER your your weapons practice.
Sidney:   Arrrrrooooooo...... did someone say donuts?
Ranger:  NO DONUTS until after weapons practice.

Maybe I should have cut out the donuts sooner.
I think the Jr. Officers are on a super high.

Let's go Jr Officers.

Fill you pistols wiff your favorite fluid and start practice  shooting!
NO Ruby..... do not let them fill dar pistols wiff margaritas.

Dui:  Baaawaahhhaaa.... Riley tagged me!
Look out Riley, you're mine!

Shelby:  Run Princess Leah, before I tag you!

Speedy:   I'm not getting my furs wet!
Oh.... and I left some poopie pellets back dar.
Do I get extra credit for dat?

Arty:  Drat..... they got my tail.
I was sure I was running fast enough.

Riley:   Abby got me.   She is sneaky.

Whitley:  Hey fellow Jr Officers.... Detective Wallace just told me dat we can get some extra credit if we all tag Ranger.    Are you in?

Jr. Officers:   YES.   Let's go! 

Class dismissed.  See y'all tomorrow.

Wags,
                        Ranger (DTC)