Saturday, April 18, 2015

Da Mayorz Marathon

Arrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooo!    I am so excited.  

Like my running shoes?

Ya see, today is da Blogville Mayorz (Stanley & Murphy's) Marathon and I'm running it it.    You know how much I just love to run.    I'm also on duty today (as Deputy Top Cop) and will be keeping my eye on everything from da front line while I run wiff all my furfriends.

Don't miss a minute of da race and cheer on #28 (dat's me).    
Read all about da BIG race HERE.  

 Wags, 
        Ranger

Sunday, April 12, 2015

No Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz's

Who is dis yawing, you ask?
It's Mom.   

She is besides herself cuz she isn't getting all her beauty sleep and it's all my doing.

WHAT ???
Ya see, for da past few weeks, I've be jingling my tags in da middle of da night (sometimes twice a night) to wake her up and let me outside.    Yep... at 2/3am and at 5/6am, I wake her up and make her let me outside so I can pee.  

Sometimes I even get to chase a bunny and make lots of high pitched yipping while I run after da bunny.   Mom doesn't like dat cuz she doesn't want me to wakey, wakey da neighbors and I refuse to come back in right away.

Now she even puts my leash on and walks me out in my yard until I pee (usually right away) and den brings me right back into the house so she can go back to bed.

Earlier dis week she was crazed and took me to da Dogster.    Da Dogster took a pee sample and a poop sample.   She also took an X-ray of my bladder (lookin for stones).
Results:   No bladder stones.   Pee looked okay too... wiff only a few tiny crystals (no biggy from a Dogster's perspective).     So...  no problem found.   She suggested dat I start eating some new urinary track food to help break down da tiny crystals as they may be irritating my bladder.     I like da new food (den again, I like any food) but Mom is still concerned for her beauty sleep.     I'm still getting her up twice a night and she is ready to pull her hair out.    Now dat should be cool.

Truth be told, I think dat she is worried about me and not sure what to do next.    She says dat maybe she should get some blood-work done (yikes) and have dem look at my kidneys.    I wish she'd stop worrying about her beauty sleep.   I think she looks fine (for a human).    I think dat Mom should just take a nap in da middle of da day (like me).

She wanted to ask me if you have any suggestions or ideas why I changed my sleeping patterns?
 Wags, 
            Ranger

Pees..... This is a new Dogster.   Mom favorite Dogster went to another practice (cross-river).

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Da Masters

So... I heard dat dar is dis show on TV dat's all about chasing balls.   Well, I do love chasing balls so I thought dat I'd get comfy and watch it.
Hummmmmmm....
Dey all seem to want an ugly green coat.   Green is not my color.   I much prefer Blue.

Looks like dey set da white ball down on da grass and den hit it wiff a shiny stick.   Den, dey walk up to da white ball and whack it wiff da shiny stick again.

Dis golf thingy is kinda boring.    
Where's all da action?    Where's da Tiger dey keep talking about?
 
Maybe if dey all chased after da ball and da 1st one to get da ball raced around da flags while de other ones chased him... den it would be much more exciting.  

Or... maybe if dey all buried dar white balls in dos holes and then played Hide & Seek... dat would be fun.

Or.... dey could have a hole digging contest in all dos sand boxes.

Or... maybe everyone could go skinny dipping in all dos water holes.   Now dat would be fun.   Don't ya think?

We dogs sure know how to have FUN.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.........

 Wags, 
              Ranger

Pees....   after I fell asleep, Mom changed da channel.  She doesn't get it either.


And now for a wee little golf humor.
Q: What are the four worst words you could hear during a round of golf?
A: It's still your turn!

Golfer: "Well, I have never played this badly before!"
Caddy: "I didn't realize you had played before, sir!"

Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."

Golfer: "Well caddy, do you like my game?"
Caddy: "Very good, sir! But personally I prefer golf."

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